NO REGRETS, LESSON EARNED

I got in the car turned on the radio and Kool and the Gang serenaded me all the home with Summer Madness. As I’m riding, along I’m thinking to myself “yep, the pimps back in the game.” I went home and pulled my old warm-up out the closet that had been tucked away for over five years. Dusted it off, shook it out and gleamed at the stitching on the back of my jacket that read “THE PIMP IS HERE.” Yes, after a long hard drought I was getting ready to get back in the game. After five years of not being near the game I knew I had a little sprucing up to do but I wasn’t about to let anybody know it. Everything began to happen so fast that I had to re-train myself in the midst of every “uh-oh, YAHTZEE…we got action.”

I began to sharpen and refine my skills every time we encountered. Initially, I thought that after five years things wasn’t quite sure how to work anymore but the devil is a lie, lol. I begin to feel things that I hadn’t never felt before, want things I hadn’t never wanted before and want to try things I hadn’t never tried before. Sometimes having friends that are well versed in something you’re not is not always a good thing. Because when you’re presented with a moment you almost forget that that’s not what you do. But, then on the other hand, it can be a great thing because you already know what to do. :~)

The summer is moving along fine but something just ain’t quite right. The things that didn’t used to bother me before I retired from the game, is now bothering me. Feelings that I never had or used to suppress is alive and in full effect. And my head game (mentally) is a mess (TICKED). My body is EXTRA sensitive and it seems like with every touch I’m falling deeper and deeper into something I’m not familiar with. And it didn’t help at all that I was physically and mentally attracted to him…FCUK! The rules of the game had already been laid out but words and feelings can manipulate a situation at any moment. We had a physical attraction out of this world for one another and every time we’d agree to not do something, we’d be right back doing it. And it didn’t help that we did it so well. It was in these moments that I realized that “I STILL GOT IT” and it’s actually better than before.

It wasn’t till our last encounter that I realized I had to cut it off. We were heading down a road that was leading nowhere. I knew what he wanted but wasn’t sure what I wanted. I knew I wanted something more substantial or something where I could see longevity, but that wasn’t where this was going right now. Once I fell back from the situation and put the emotions to the side, I could see the picture a lot clearer. I didn’t want to but I had to cut the tie now before we got too deep and I couldn’t/wouldn’t know how. Plus, I knew he wouldn’t, he tried and failed miserably at it, LOL! In the end he understood where I was coming from and our respect for one another remained intact.

As for that warm-up, I guess you already know I never got a chance to wear it. It was actually outdated and out of season. I have no regrets from this event but have learned that as you mature, playing games slowly exits out of your life. Looking at the facts and keeping it REAL with YOURSELF begins to take its place. If it’s meant to be it’ll come back around more refined and tailored to fit me, if not, then something better will take its place. As for Summer Madness, it's still playing in the background except now it has a new meaning. :~P

He's Just not that into you...anymore

I have not seen the movie or read the book or watched Oprah talk about it....these are just more of my random thoughts

No more good mornings, good evenings or lucky goodnights
Maybe a hello, how you doing, or hey....maybe
No more shard thoughts, dreams, or desires
Only a comlpaint or two and a let's talk about something else
I'll call you back in a few minutes
since when do minutes turn into hours and hours into days.....
Seriously, why haven't you called me in two days?!?

Since when did we have to beg for it....
I am way to stuck up to ask for a date
Way to confident....
The Treasure never does the hunting
Time to move on...

But lets face reality
when you completely let go and move on look who is back at your doorstep...
yep you got it.

It's him....
not wanting to see you with anyone else
oh no not hating is what he says
but also not wanting to step up to the plate
So is he playing hard to get?
Thats your role not his
Or is he just not that into you

Marriage...

Well, it's almost that time of the year again..."WEDDING SEASON." Each year as this season approaches I question whether or not I'm ready for marriage. And each year I conlude "NO!" Marriage is more than just a conventional hook-up that many have dove into. The person that I marry today may and more than likely will not be the same person 10-15 years from now. So, getting married for supreficial reasons is overrated to me. Marriage is supposed to be a committment to share with one another through the good and the bad.

A few years back I hung on the fence as to whether or not I would divorce my husband if he cheated. Now I'm off the fence but I got a machete in my hand over by the fence :-)! I hang cheating up there with lying, once you breach that line of trust its hard to get it back. Why cheat? If you're not happy or satisfied....say you're not happy or satisfied and try to work it out. If it can't be worked out then DIP! But if we could work through it, then I'd be willing to do it because we took vows of "...for better or for worse." Now if you step out again, it's a wrap...I'm chucking you the deuces.

The other thing that scares me about this is what if the shoe is on the other foot and I cheated, then what? If I cry that I wasn't been satisfied or he never tried to work on us, would I still feel as strongly as I would if it happend to me? I don't know but hopefully I won't have to find that out. I don't really forsee myself cheating but anything is possible...right?

MY VAGINA'S MONOLOGUE

I’ve been down here in seclusion for so long,
I wonder if I can bounce back
My owner has been tripping lately and won’t cut me no slack
She got her head caught up in that Book
she deems to be a major deal,
I just want a head caught up on my hook,
Pardon me for a second, do you mind if I keep it real
I’m fiending for some attention, I need a connection
I need some interaction, I ain’t afraid of protection
But she keep imposing these random injections
Whenever I get the body to say okay, her mouth reneges and says no
It’s thoroughly pissing me off and in a minute I’m about to blow
She so up and down, she got me going through the changes
Every time I set something up,
she reads something then comes back and rearranges it
Who does she think she is, do she know who I am
I am what make her who is she is
and here she is disregarding me like spam
I feel like there’s no respect and she never hears me out
Whenever I try to speak she shushes me at the mouth
Me and the rest of the body are thinking about going on strike
Cuz we’d be damned if she think
this is how we’re going to live out the rest of our life
I over heard her telling somebody the other day,
that she no longer thinks she’s ready for marriage
I almost had a conniption right then and there,
And was tempted to close down shop
to spare any future embarrassment
Out of all the vagina’s out there, I’m the only one not being used
I’m filing a complaint to the vagina authorities
because this has got to be vagina abuse
She taking this virtuous thing a little too far
And her purity aspect is set way above any bar
All I wanna do is get what’s rightfully mine
But she keep replying in “due time”
Time is due now, matter of fact, time is past due
Who ever “in due time” is, I can’t wait to get my hands on you
And if she read another piece of literature,
ask for more strength from her Savior,
thumb through another page of that Book,
or continually change her behavior
I’ma just go silent
She won’t hear a peep out of me
I’ma just sit back and see what “waiting” allots me to see
Whatever it is, it better be right
It better be the best that she’s never had or we gon fight
Because I personally think this waiting thing ain’t polite
But since this is what she want to do,
I’ma just sit tight

©NEECHI/2009

A message from DOWN BELOW...

you hooo down here.. umm what the hell have you been doing? i mean damn can a sista get a dyck or what! nica we have come to far to turn back now... i know they say "you can't miss what you never had" but bytch we've had it, and we've had it good! don't you miss that shyt? phuck.. let a nica bust a nut or something. remember the 3 strikes rule.. damn, you've just took us out the game... granted we haven't seen a YAHTZEE in a minute, but shyt maybe we should lower the standards and just go for a bingo or shyt maybe even a gold fish or UNO. you are being influenced by ALL the wrong "good" people right now..lol i need to get mine, forget all the b.s you've heard. you don't even seem to be trippin over this ish no more... nica we used to tremble like a fiend without it, now yo azz just reading and ish.. wtf!!! can i be traded?!... clearly you have no use for me right now, you even stop a bytch from bleeding... WTF you taking the pills for, if you were to get pregnant it would be a shock to all of us... hell i may file a lawsuit for not being able to enjoy the conception. man i hope we find a yahtzee soon... cuz yo picky azz gone make me dry up. stop thinking so much. why can't you just get loose like the rest of em?! everybody's doing it... (peer pressure never worked on your azz) get drunk and blame it on the alcohol like the song says..lol however you have to do it, just do it.

- Young Snapper

Dear Summer... I can't wait to see you

Dear Summer...

What is it about summer that makes you ready to recruit a new roster. There is just something about the warm weather that even makes those depressed during the long, lonely & cold winter feel as if it's time to play! EVERYONE chics and guys, tries to get it tight and right for the summer. The increase in people at the gym is CRAZY right now... everybody and they momma in there.. Those in a shaky relationship need beware. Shaky relationships equals single when it comes to summer. This summer I will be embracing my singleness. I want a committed relationship, and I know in time it will come. (Hopefully before next winter..lol) This summer however I will just be taking man resumes...lol I'm going to enjoy it to the fullest.. If the right guy comes along, then that's fine. If not, then that will be ok too... either way I'm having fun. I will have the rest of my life to be committed to whoever the lucky fella is, in the meantime I need to meet the not so lucky. (Consider it research). This summer reinvent yourself. Improve on things that you know you need work on, but add another dimension to yourself too. Have fun, you only live once.